Coming of Age by Lucy Foulkes: 'wise and revelatory' guide to the teenage mind

What does your "reminiscence bump" look like, asked David Shariatmadari in The Guardian . If that sounds "like a blow to the head with a touch of amnesia", it is not – but it can still be painful. As the psychologist Lucy Foulkes explains in her new book, the term refers to the period during which adults report the "greatest number of important autobiographical memories". It tends to start when we're about ten and "peaks at 20, taking in a plethora of firsts": first kiss, first love, first dabblings with drink or drugs, as well as bullying, break-ups and bereavements.

And as Foulkes shows, these "enduringly vivid" years "define the adults we become". Our identities, she argues in "Coming of Age", are shaped by the stories we tell about ourselves – and adolescence is when "this narration begins in earnest". By turns funny, hair-raising and moving, the book is a "wise and revelatory" guide to the complexities of the teenage mind.

Any "parent of a newly minted teenager" is likely to feel especially grateful for this book, said Lucy Denyer in The Daily Telegraph . For it suggests that all the "tricky", anxiety-inducing behaviours that teenagers engage in are necessary stages on the road to adulthood. It is by experimenting with risk that teenagers learn to become independent. Their obsession with fitting in, infuriating as it may be, helps them to figure out how to find their tribe.

Foulkes "expertly marshals clinical research", and interlaces it with accounts from people who've spoken to her "about their formative years", said Kate Womersley in The Observer . Her study will speak to adults still coming to terms with their adolescence, while perhaps also trying to guide their children through these "murky waters". If it has a flaw, it is that it does not give enough consideration to the way the digital revolution has transformed the experience of being a teenager.

Foulkes is especially interesting on school cliques, which she sees as "complex systems worth studying on their own terms", said Sophie McBain in The New Statesman . She draws a distinction between the supposedly "popular kids", who are actually often "envied and disliked", and those with "high sociometric popularity" – the often "decent" ones who are "liked by almost everyone". The latter, she says, typically go on to succeed in life; the "cool kids", not so much. This is a book that should have a wide readership. After all, we were all teenagers once, and as Foulkes argues, a better understanding of our own "awkward, in-between years" will help us become better adults.

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