Technology has revolutionized our lives, offering unprecedented levels of connection, convenience and security. From social media and GPS tracking to shared calendars and home surveillance systems, these advancements streamline communication, monitor loved ones and provide peace of mind. However, in some relationships, instead of offering convenience and security, technology becomes a tool for manipulation, control and oppression, referred to as coercive control and considered a form of domestic violence.
As legal professionals, we must recognize the signs of domestic violence to encourage clients to seek help and to alert judges to its presence in a relationship because it is a factor that must be considered in a court’s determination of spousal support, custody and equitable distribution.
Although the urge to monitor a partner’s whereabouts, communications and activities might be strong during a divorce, and does not always rise to the level of coercive control, it often crosses legal boundaries. Placing hidden cameras, using spyware, or attaching AirTags to a vehicle may constitute the crimes of stalking and harassment. In New York, it is legal to record conversations, as long as one party consents. However, clients should be cautioned that the value of information gained from such recordings often damages their credibility at trial and may subject them to criminal prosecution.
Joint email accounts, social media accounts, phone plans, calendars and home security systems often become the source of damaging evidence at any trial. It is crucial that we advise clients on how to modify their technology use so they do not inadvertently convert that technology into spyware during a divorce.
Securing and evaluating tech tools
Divorce forces a re-evaluation of previously shared technology, which can inadvertently become tools for surveillance and evidence at any trial. Here’s where initiative-taking steps become vital:
- Revoke shared accounts: Clients should cease sharing tablets, computers, phones and email accounts.
- Change passwords: All existing passwords require immediate updates.
- Seek expert help: In suspected cases of spyware or hacking, a forensic computer expert can locate and disable it.
- Request device disabling: Request that existing audio/video technology within the home be disabled, and revoke any prior consent.
- Review existing recordings: Clients should secure any stored recordings in the cloud or their devices.
- Social media: Advise clients to stop posting altogether and include a social media restriction clause in your retainer agreement to protect clients from inadvertently damaging their case.
What is coercive control? According to Psychology Today, “Coercive control is a strategic form of ongoing psychological and emotional abuse that denies a victim their autonomy and sense of self.” Coercive control is an insidious form of domestic violence, not easily recognized or understood in the context of a divorce. Perpetrators often cite safety concerns to justify using technology to track their partner’s whereabouts. They may also isolate a spouse from friends and family and encourage financial dependence under the guise of protecting or taking care of them, but the result is to limit their autonomy. Insisting that a partner loses weight or exercises more often is disguised as a concern for their health, but the criticism often undermines their already poor self-esteem. Using compliments, pleading or promises to cajole a partner into engaging in behaviors they find demeaning, or that violate their personal boundaries, further erodes their sense of self. When confronted, perpetrators of coercive control claim their behavior is motivated by genuine concern, or a desire to “save” or “protect” their partner. Often victims of coercive control do not see this behavior as a form of domestic violence because there are no bruises, which is the most recognizable sign of abuse. However, the emotional and psychological damage to victims of coercive control is devastating and hard to prove. If victims do not seek treatment, it happens again in future relationships.
Classifying coercive control as a crime in New York State
In 2010, France was one of the first countries to name coercive control as a crime, and a form of domestic violence, followed by Scotland (2015), the United Kingdom (2015), Wales (2015), Ireland (2018) and Canada (2020).
In the United States, there is no federal statute that criminalizes coercive control or recognizes it as a form of domestic violence. California (Senate Bill 1141), Connecticut (Senate Bill 1091), Hawaii (HB 2425) and New Jersey (N.J.A 2C:13-5) are among the few states that recognize coercive control as a crime, or a form of domestic violence.
There is legislation pending in New York (S5650 and A3147) to amend the NYS Penal Law to make coercive control a Class E Felony.
Recognizing coercive control as a crime in New York is the best way to prevent it from happening and for courts to include it as a factor in a divorce action.
Building awareness and recognizing the signs Educating yourself about the signs of coercive control and recognizing that it is a form of domestic violence will make you a better advocate for your client inside and outside the courtroom. By addressing and understanding the use and misuse of technology at the outset of the attorney-client relationship, you can shield your clients from potential legal pitfalls and emotional turmoil.
Dina De Giorgio is a partner at Schwartz Sladkus Reich Greenberg Atlas LLP in the firm’s Long Island office. She practices in the area of matrimonial and family law. Copyright © 2024 BridgeTower Media. All Rights Reserved.
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