‘My father won't come to my wedding because my mother will be there’

One woman has confessed that her parents' negative relationship has led her f ather to not want to attend her wedding . Taking to Reddit, she gave readers some more context about the tricky situation.

She wrote: “I (25F) and my fiancé (26M) got engaged this year , 2024, and are planning a wedding in October of 2027. “We want to make sure we can afford the wedding of our dreams, so we planned for a long engagement and settled on 3 years from now.

“My mother is so supportive, and has always been the rock in my life, meanwhile, my father and I didn't speak for a few years while I was pregnant with my first son, and part of my pregnancy with my second son.

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“I am his only child, and even when I was pregnant he never reached out. I cut contact because he turns a blind eye to my mental health and all of my diagnosis, but he somehow still blames me for not reaching out sooner.”

She dove into her father’s relationship with her mother.

She wrote: “My father and his family always hated my mother, and didn't shy away from bad-mouthing her whenever I was around, so it's not a surprise necessarily, but my mom is putting in all of this effort and money into our wedding with us, my dad refused to help pay for it, and now states that he won't be attending if my mother is there, nor will my aunts, uncles, cousins or grandparents.

“My cousin was actually supposed to be one of my bridesmaids, so that's down the drain I guess. Would I be a terrible person for drifting away again? It doesn't seem like he wants to change for the better, and I don't want my kids dealing with the same situations I dealt with.”

Reddit users chimed in with their takes.

One social media user wrote: “Definitely feel free to cut your dad out, but don't just take his word for it about the rest of the family, especially the cousin. If you feel close enough to ask her to be in the wedding party, you should be close enough to discuss the matter.”

Another person chimed in: “Invite everyone and let them decide. If your father continues acting this way, you can absolutely go no contact.”

And someone else said: “You’ve already stated your mom is you rock so why would this even be a question in your mind? Ditch the dad and enjoy your beautiful wedding with friends/family and give your mom the place she deserves like walking you down the aisle.”